Sleeping Beauty Castle trinket necklaces are a big topic of conversation. 

My friend Manu (who had never met the princesses in her adult life) tried to do princess hands, however Cinderella didn’t show us how so Manu kind of prayed. The photo pass lady was so offended by her lack of brilliant princess expertise that she stopped taking photos to say purposefully: “it’s actually like THIS” and we were all dying

this was the only photo taken of the prayer pose
i hold it close to my soul 
AHAHAHAHA 

I loved her new dress! <3

who promoted me how did i get 8 new followers

i still can’t even scarcely believe that i am now an NYU student. 
it keeps dawning on me every few minutes or so and i have to take a moment to process it. i’m experiencing all these quiet kinds of joy and i am so, so blessed and excited.

a week ago i was a calarts dropout not sure where i’d be in the next few months, let alone the next 3 years. i was feeling friendless and unsure and starting to get a little hopeless. i didn’t know what was going to happen, but now i know. i am not grateful to this past school year for any reason, but it has enabled this moment to feel a thousand times more wonderful. i find out my studio this coming monday, and i will officially be registering tonight. i can’t believe that i get to go to new york with my best friends and have the year i’ve dreamt of since i was 12 and discovered what NYU was.

i can’t even believe it. <3

Countdown to the Most Magical Place on Earth! So excited. <3

• i can break your arm via the point of your elbow, using only my hips.
• in that same position, i can simultaneously choke you to death.
• i know 4 different ways of kicking you in the balls. really really hard. 
• i can also knock the wind out of you using only my forearms,
• and break your nose with my hand.
• if you grab me by my wrist, i can break free in less than a second, while injuring your thumb.
• this includes if you grab my wrists by both hands.
• i can get out of your grasp if you grab me by my hair,
• and should you grab me from behind and/or cover my mouth, i can get out of that hold as well, and then proceed to literally destroy your penis.
• i can stop you from choking me.
• if you try to rape me with a gun in your hand, i can disarm you in less than 4 seconds, and proceed to shoot you.
• this includes if you have a knife at my throat.
• if you try and rape me, i can get you off of me, no matter what position you are in, weather or not you weigh 120lbs or 180lbs, even if your entire body is pressed down on mine and you are holding both my hands. 
• this includes sitting on me.
• if you try to lift my leg over your shoulder, i can put you in a choke-hold that will either give you permanent brain damage, or kill you in less than 2 minutes, as it cuts off your main arteries that deliver blood to your skull.
• i can do all of this blindfolded.

for my entire teenage life, i have felt an inescapable feeling wherever i am, be it in the day time or at night, that a man could assault me at any given moment. the day after my first class was the first time i didn’t feel that way anymore. i went to trader joes, walked alone across a parking lot, and didn’t feel it for a second. it was the first time i felt safe in my own body, and that even though there was no 100% guarantee i would be safe if a guy ever did approach me, i know that i would know what to do if he did, and not feel powerless. it dawned on me that i had literally never felt safe out alone, ever. now i do. i have been attempted to be coerced into sex at parties, boys have literally pushed my legs apart, i haven’t known what to do if walking away hadn’t worked- and now i will never need to worry again.

i seriously urge every girl following me to take a class in defense, wherever you are. if you live in the LA area, definitely inbox me so i can give you the exact info of who i take class from. it’s expensive, but it’s incredibly worth it, and he is an amazing teacher.

but today he was with me when I opened my acceptance letter.

I got the email at 6am, but I was too terrified to open it until 4:30pm, about 2 hours ago. I got home, and I was distraught, because I just imagined it being a no, and having to go through another year of the shit I went through this year, and I couldn’t stand it, so I got a picture of him and was talking to him, and I didn’t quite know what to do. I said, “I wish you were here, with me, to be here when I find out. I wish you had been here all year when I didn’t know what to do.”

So I got his picture, and I walked out on the porch where we always used to sit, and I held his picture in my left hand, and my phone with the email in my right. and I looked at his photo and then up at the sky and I said, “should I open it? I don’t know what to do dad. Do I open it?”

and suddenly a beautiful breeze blew all the leaves of the trees above me, and it made the wind chimes that he had hung when i was 6 sing, and I looked down at my phone, and it said I had gotten in.

it could have been a coincidence, but i felt like he was here. and i am so happy.

IM AN NYU STUDENT!!!!!!!!

you can say whatever you want about disney

but please acknowledge that it’s entire franchise in it’s ENTIRETY

is dependent on women.

you can take women out of marvel comics/movies, out of universal, out of dreamworks, looney toons cartoons, and most/all non-animated movie companies, and those companies and their success would barely be affected

you take women out of disney, their entire franchise collapses. 

just something to think about. 

disney is built upon woman protagonists. without them, the company fails. disney bought partnership with pixar because they understand that. they bought marvel and lucasfilms because they understand that. they have their original animated characters, goofy, the mice, pluto, donald and daisy and the chipmunks, but there’s a giant castle in the center of the parks, people.

disney, by itself, is 100% dependent on their woman characters.

Aurora! (:

YAY! I’ll give the exact dates to all you guys working, but I’m so excited to see you all! <3 

the night was still
when i thought i saw my name inside your mouth
and the breeze sang in the trees
and brought goosebumps to
my elbows

i thought i saw my skin
in the longing spaces between your fingers
for the night was cold and blue
and there was dew on the
grass

i thought i saw my lips on yours:
for they left an
invisible itch,

but i was mistaken

(and the crickets hummed
to find their lovers
as so did i
for you
and i thought i heard you whispering 
back
but it was only the comets
grasping my heart in their snickering starfields
and playing tricks
on me;

it was the cruel moon
that lit my way home 
pooling white light around my eyes
that made me think i could see well
despite having eyes
made for the sun,

and against the shadow
of the you
it hid so well
i have always been
sorely
mistaken
and against that you i tripped
even though i swore i could find my
footing

and although i am aware
that you
do not
i sometimes wonder
if you ever
think of me-

i wonder if you know
the color of my eyes
like the way i know
of yours
and i wonder if
before you sleep
my name ever crosses
your tired,
jumbled thoughts-

i wonder if 
when you saw me
you felt the stars
tremble in their orbits,

and ever 
if you even
if you ever
loved me

back).

I’m really terrified of turning 20. 20s are the years for dreams coming true. And 10 years from now, which isn’t even long at all, I’ll be 30. That’s very grown.
Too grown for me. ): I’m scared of not getting my dreams.

This will be my last mention of it (unless you guys ask me questions, which, please, feel free to) tonight. Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart and soul, for your reblogs to try and help him be found. He has been found, and his family and friends are so happy. A bunch of kids from our graduating class were out looking for him today and we are all happy beyond belief right now. 

Thank you guys so much. I know Theo appreciates it, too. Next time I see him, I’ll tell him he was *this* close to being tumblr famous. (: 

Today is the day to tell people you care about them, and show them as well. I didn’t think in my wildest dreams that someone from my graduating class would try to leave this earth. And I don’t want any one of you to be like me, and to look at your friend when it’s almost too late, or is, and think, “I wish I had called him, or seen him” like I did. Don’t ever give yourself the chance to feel that way. No matter how happy a person looks, they could be this close to leaving. I was so lucky today that we were all given a second chance. 

Thank you to everyone who prayed for him and searched for him today. Thank you guys so much. <3 

You hugged me at the musical and told me I should come over to your apartment sometime. You had my number but I didn’t have yours. You didn’t text me, but I should have gotten your number. I should have visited you. I know nothing I did could change that you’re missing today but I wish I had gone anyway. I wish that you were okay and that you didn’t post that letter and I hope that we’ll find you soon. 

You visited our old high school yesterday and nobody knew it was to say goodbye. Please come back. Please let me make up for not being a friend to you. I’m sorry for rolling my eyes at my friend when you made a sexist comment. I’m sorry I didn’t reach out to you. I’m sorry. Come home.